GUEST POST: MY NIQAB STORY - THE UNEXPECTED TURN

What is modesty?

Everyone has their own definition of it and is seen in different lights across the globe. The dictionary meaning is seen as "behaviour, manner, or appearance intended to avoid impropriety or indecency."

This meaning inclines towards what Islam defines as modesty. Modesty for me has always been an integral part of my life. Growing up, I had been brought up to bring modesty into my life, not only by the way I dress but with my character and social interactions. My journey towards niqaab was not something I had planned to happen. Although I had always admired it and had an inclination towards, it never occurred to me that it would happen at the age of 19. So this is how it all unfolded.

My father being an Islamic scholar and my mother a revert. My parents always put Islam first. Often my friends or classmates would be shocked if I told them my mother was a revert. Because of her love and passion for Islam people would always assume she was born and raised Muslim. When I reached the age of puberty, I took it upon myself to wear the hijab, I knew what it meant but I never had that depth as I was young and had not reached that level of intellect.

As years went by I started realizing that I was doing things because I knew I HAD to do them and I started noting my connection with my creator was becoming weaker and weaker. At that time the thing that I was most connected to was music and I had lost my desire and sweetness of doing acts of worship. Although I kept my hijab on, I knew something was missing. I finished highschool and that's where it all began. A few months after a series of events had started occurring one after the other and it was almost like a domino effect.

I was quiet sickly for that year and kind of lost my passion for being social. Looking back my sickness was the best thing that ever happened to me. As I was in and out of the doctors office, I started withdrawing from music and I spent a lot of time alone. In that time I rediscovered Allah. I started opening the Quran more often and praying with khushu and it was amazing. Although it was a very difficult time, I was the happiest I could ever be. So during that time, I started covering up more and started become more conscious of my purpose.

So I started thinking about wearing niqab in my second year after highschool. I was very adamant about it because I was worried about what my family would say so I kept on shrugging it off. I say wallahi every time I kept shrugging it off, the feeling would come back stronger and so I kept shrugging it off. I had a brief conversation with one of my closest friends, more like a sister really and she was also thinking about wearing it . Time went by and Alhamdullilah Allah blessed her with the opportunity and she started wearing it.

At the end of 2016 Allah blessed with the opportunity with persuading my Islamic studies so I started at the beginning of this year. I wore it part time and still I felt something was missing. Whenever I wore it, I felt tranquility. When I did not wear it, I felt uneasy and that's when I knew I had to do it. It was not easy deciding but Alhamdullilah I took the opportunity with both hands and I don't ever want to look back. Being the only one who wears it in my family is actually liberating.

Will there be challenges? Of course. I will tell you one thing for sure - it's worth it. When I put it on I think about how on the day qiyaama when the sun will be scorching hot and maybe because I strove and I worked hard , Allah will grant me jannah. That maybe just maybe a family member will admire it and look into Islam. That at the end of it all I have hope. Hope that Allah will have mercy on me and I will be in jannah narrating this very incidents to my friends as a far fetched memory. That on that day Allah will engulf me with his mercy despite me having sins, that HIS mercy will enter me into paradise through this struggle.

It is worth it my beloved sisters and don't ever give up because it always gets better. This is my journey and I pray that I continue to strive right till the end. This world is only temporary but JANNAH IS FOREVER.


Yours truly Salmaah xxx

If you're inspired by Sister Salmaah's story (and I know you are In sha Allah!), do head over to her blog Travellerofthedunya. Trust me, it's a great blog. Very honest, straightforward and more than all, inspiring.

DIARY OF A NIQABI: FIRST DAY AT COLLEGE

So, I enrolled into a course and as anyone else, I was pretty nervous about my first day at College. And for Niqabis especially, the nervous-o-meter must be really, really high because somewhere in the corner of our mind, we're already bracing ourselves to having to explain our Niqab.
 

The first day is always the hardest. My sister and I (Alhamdulillah I had someone with me for morale support :)) walked into the class and two students were already seated. I smiled at them which they probably wouldn't have noticed with the Niqab and they smiled at me. I took my place right behind them and those two girls turned behind and they were like 'So, this is your first class?' And we got into a conversation and immediately I felt at ease.

Alhamdulillah, there was another Niqabi and a few other Hijabis in the class as well so I settled in pretty well. The lecturer walked in then and he noticed two new students. So he asked me for my name which I said. I thought I was pretty loud but he asked me to repeat again. I did and he said 'I hope I don't mind having to repeat yourself' (because he couldn't hear me with the Niqab) and I said 'It's ok, I'm used to it'. And he smiled.
 

It's true. The girl at the front desk told she couldn't understand me properly as well and honestly, the fault is all mine. I am a very fast talker so I guess with the Niqab, it does make it hard for some people. So Niqabis, take note. Make sure to speak slowly and very clearly :)

And then the lecturer went on with the lesson and somewhere in between, he asked me why I wear the Niqab. He pointed to a girl who wore the Abaya and another Hijabi and he was like, they are dressed differently so why do you cover your face? At this point, I'll be frank, I was having a thousand things running in my mind. I mean, I've been writing about the Niqab for years now and everything just came rushing into my head but I thinking, 'Ok take it calm'. I probably overreacted a bit lol. But I told him quiet simply 'It's just a matter of choice'. And he nodded 'Yes of course'. 
 

This lecturer, I understood, was just genuinely curious and when we do get the chance to tell anyone why we wear the Niqab, then make sure you tell them simply. Of course, there's no need to launch into big talks - just one sentence would do :) 

On the second day, I had to pray at class or I would have to miss my Zhuhr salah. So in the short break between two lessons, I ran up to another lecturer (a woman this time) and asked if I could use the back of the class to pray. She was like 'Yes of course. Can you pray there? Do you want another class?' 
 

I prayed at the back of the class and just after I was done the other students were like 'Sorry, did we disturb you?' I told them they didn't and I took my seat. The girl at the front turned behind and she asked 'So you guys pray five times a day, right?' And I told her yes and that I needed to pray now or by the time the lesson ended, the time for that particular prayer would have ended too. She seemed really interested in it.
 

SubhanAllah, I love it when people are so nice and non-judgemental about Muslims and Niqabis in particular. These kind of people, they really make the world a better place to live in. I know I probably sound outrageously cheesy but it's really nice :)
 

We were then having this group activity thingy and one of the girls asked me why I wore the Niqab and if my parents asked me to. The other girls were looking at me for an answer and I told 'No. They didn't ask me to but my mother and older sisters were already wearing the Niqab and I felt I wanted to do as well'. I also told them that I went to Saudi Arabia for the pilgrimage and that's when I really decided and this girl nodded and she was like 'Ah yeah. Makka, right?'
 

The truth is, most non Muslims don't understand why Muslim women wear the Hijab or Niqab and most of them are honestly curious to know why we do it. They may not have had to chance to ask anyone else and when they do ask you, make sure you talk to them nicely and tell them. If we don't, or if we behave even slightly hostile, they wouldn't even want to talk. And if we don't tell them, what choice would they have other than to believe that the media is true and that Islam is really oppressive towards women?

The point I'm trying to get at is that we tend to think that non-Muslims are very hostile to the Niqab but the reality is that not all of them are like that. In fact, majority of the people I've come across and very understanding and friendly and treat Niqabis just as they treat anyone else. And that feels really good. 

It has only been my second day at college but already, I feel so at ease. The students and lecturers, even the front desk and everyone else were so friendly, understanding and just wonderful people. Alhamdulillah.

Since it's just the early days now, I might have some interesting college experiences to share in the future, In sha Allah. And if I do, I'll be sure to share it here.

So any other Hijabis/Niqabis - do you have your own experiences to share?

 

 

"NO WAY WILL I MARRY A NIQABI!"

Niqabis live a life of pressure, let me tell you that, particularly if you happen to live in a non-Muslim country. On one side, you've got people calling you a 'Terrorist! Take Cover!" and the classic "Go back to your own country" (Well thank you, I'm already in my own country). And on the other side it's the pressure from the family "Oh come on, you're too young to wear the Niqab. Enjoy your life more" and of course, the pressure of the world in general... 

 

Niqabis - relatable much?

So anyway, I'm going a bit personal today. And I'll get right into it. Why is it so difficult for a Niqabi to be married? Or I had better rephrase it- Why do Muslim men not want to marry Niqabis? 

I've had the answer to this question in the most bizzare ways. Let me highlight it here.

It's taboo

Actually, a matchmaker told this to my mother. And my mother was just lost for words. I mean, back in the day when the Sahaba women covered their faces, would anyone have told it straight at their faces that it's taboo? Seriously, when did obeying Allah and doing something for Him become taboo? 

It's too extreme

 

So yes, in today's world where the more skin you show, the more free you are, I guess they've got a point in saying Niqabis are extreme. I mean, look at it this way: They choose to be extremely modest so yeah, if you don't want to marry a Niqabi, then it's a valid point you've given. Too extreme indeed.

She's disgusting when she eats out

This again is what a matchmaker told my mother. So apparently, this particular groom was utterly disgusted with the phenomenon of a Niqabi lifting her Niqab to eat her food at the restaurant. Say we Niqabis actually eat disgusting, then how would you know your future wife is going to be a decent eater. I mean, not all people eat decently, right? So what's the big deal? 

 

And umm, since when did our eating become you problem?

She won't talk to guests when they come over after marriage

So apparently, this is how they think we Niqabis are going to react when guests come over

 

... When in fact, we're going to be pretty much like this

 

I mean seriously, do you think that just by wearing the Niqab, we transform into cold-blooded human being that can't tolerate to stay with others? Like, seriously? 

 

So the matchmakers have now started telling my mother that she should ask my sister to remove her Niqab if she has to get married. SubhanAllah, see what the Muslim Ummah is coming to! Of course, it was a flat no because even if it means not getting married, why should we compromise on our values of wearing the Niqab just because someone else doesn't like it? 

 

But you know what- this is a test. Niqabis in my country especially have a real hard time getting married because most men nowadays apparently don't like their wives being covered. Less Hijab she has, the greater her chances of marriage are.

 

But Allah is the one who has already chosen who is to get married to whom. And because we are wearing the Niqab in obedience to Allah, do you think Allah is just going to abandon you like that? He will test you and see if you will take off the Niqab (which unfortunately I've seen many Niqabis do) and if you persist in doing what you are doing, then In sha Allah, when the time is right, Allah will give the best partner. Don't despair dear Niqabis :)

And as a final note, here goes:

 

THE JOURNEY OF A YOUNG NIQAABI

 

GUEST POST

 



 

'Sinners judge sinners for sinning differently'  - a phrase that I'm sure almost all of us have seen before.

 

Well if you don't know what it means, I'd love to enlighten you.

 

You see, it's the twenty first century and almost everyone can't help but judge the next person; we look at everyone's clothes, their social standing, their relationship status, who they associate themselves with, the acts they do in public and sometimes even try and pry into what they do in private. We judge people for the sins they might have committed and we love to share our newfound information with others, yet if someone were to share our sins with people, we might never feel like leaving our homes.

 

When people suddenly take a step in deen, we classify them as acting 'too holy'  or being a 'show off' yet if we take a step in deen, we might want to tell it to the world or keep it to ourselves. But buttercup, the thing is people's sins and people's good deeds are between them and Allah and our sins and our good deeds are between us and Allah.

 

Let me tell you about my journey and allow you to understand my rant above.

 

Well you see, growing up, my mum wouldn't ever allow me to wear sleeveless clothing or even knee high shorts. I never wore a dress without a leggings or pants underneath and if we were to go out at night I wasn't allowed to leave without a scarf.

 

I always thought it was embarrassing because other people my age or even few years older would wear mini skirts and have their hair loose all night. They were allowed to wear anything anytime. When we attended family occasions I felt odd, all my cousins would be in revealing clothes and I knew they also spoke about what I was wearing. From the age of 10 my mum would try and get me into a scarf as much as possible, and every time I got the opportunity I'd rip it off so fast. When we went on vacation or even to the pool, unlike everyone my age, I wore  'appropriate' clothing and I started to hate it even more and more.

 

Months before my 13th birthday, my family was fortunate enough to be able to go for umrah. During the journey I was only allowed to wear a jilbab out of the hotel. My mum made sure I didn't show a strand of hair.

 

Eventually when I reached the age of puberty, it was a year later than most of the girls in my class, my mum declared it that I can't leave the house without hijab, so I swindled my way about and would roll up my long sleeved clothing and let a little hair show. I would try and get a skinnier jeans or a shorter t-shirt. This went on for what seemed like horrible and long time.

 

In the beginning of 2016, my mum took me shopping to buy new clothes and swim wear for the vacation were going to take. And so I bought clothes, I bought really loose pants, long shirts, loose long sleeve tops and less skinnier jeans. The Friday before we left for our vacation, my mum pulled out a huge packet of black scarfs and told me to take some new ones. While picking the scarfs I came across a niqaab that my mum wore while we went for umrah. Messing around I tried it on and even laughed at how it looked on me. During that vacation, I wore figure fitting swimwear everyday to the beach and I wore tights a few times.

 

It was two weeks after I returned from the vacation, a Monday night, I entered the shower to take a ghusal and while in the shower I thought back to the day I tried on the niqaab.

And during my moment in the shower I remembered something that I learnt from an extra islamiaat class that my mum and I attended. Our teacher spoke about how when Allah chooses to guide somebody, that person should grip onto that thought of increasing their imaan so quickly that it won't even have a chance to move away.

 

So in that shower I gripped onto mine and decided that no matter what. I was going to go into niqaab.

 

When I came out of the bathroom I performed my maghrab salaah and proceeded to message the only niqaabi friend I had at that moment and told her the great news. I don't even think she knows how much our whatsapp conversation helped me with my journey into niqaab.

 

That night I randomly mentioned it to my mum and to the rest of my family. I don't think they were totally ready to hear what I had to say but I didn't let anything bad enter my ears.

 

And so the next morning February 2nd 2016 I started my journey of niqaab.

 

When people seen me at the initial stages they would say ''I wouldn't fully commit to it if I were you. Just try it out for a week or two. You are only 15 years old after all.'' I would just smile and nod at them but deep down in my heart I was saying to myself ''no matter what anybody tells me, I'm not wearing my niqaab for a week or two, I'm going to wear niqaab my whole life''.

 

And so I did it. Almost 11 months down the line and الحمد لله I have never had the thought of ever leaving my journey of niqaab.

 

When people bring up the question "Why did you go into niqaab?" I feel as though I can not really give them the answer they want to hear. But the real reason I went into niqaab is only because my Allah is the most majestic. If it were not for Allah the most high, I certainly  would have never been in niqaab.

 

I feel so safe and so modest with my niqaab on. Yes, I still have weak points of my imaan. And yes, I think my journey of niqaab has strengthened some parts of my imaan. But now when I now see someone with proper hijab, niqaab or even the burqa, I admire them for the strength they have, and when I see people who have not yet reached the level where others have, I admire them for still making an effort,.I am not the one to judge anyone. We all have our own struggles and our struggles do not need to be spoken about in a gossip column or anywhere else for that matter.

We should all just thank Allah for what he has given us and continue making dua for ourselves and one another.

 

And well here I am. I young niqaabi who is still in school, and has not let the media, family, friends, community and the world have a bad influence my decision of niqaab.

 

Also I am grateful to my wonderful mum for keeping up with such a difficult child like me and making sure that I went into hijaab. And I'm extremely grateful to Allah for everything including my wonderful mum.

 

- Zainab from South Africa

 

 

If you would like to share your Hijab or Niqab stories or experiences, send us an email on niqablovers@gmail.com and share your story to inspire Muslimahs all over!

 

* Click here to read other inspirations stories from other sisters, just like you: Guest Posts

 

THE WOES OF A BESPECTACLED NIQABI

I don't know what I would do without my favourite Niqab - the same one I've been wearing for years now. Yes I know, it seems Eww-ish but you know, when you get attached to something, it's rather hard to pull yourself away. But mind you, I wash my Niqab very often so there's nothing too Eww-ish about it after all (I guess?)

Anyway, my favourite Niqab can also turn out to make me look like an utterly goofy Niqabi sometimes, particularly seeing as I am a bespectabled Niqabi. What's the big deal with that, you may ask? Well honestly, there's no big deal. It's actually a small deal that I'm trying to make a big deal of so I have something to write about :D

 

Here's the small deal:

 

The Misting

 

I know, I know, 'The Misting' sounds so mysterious but here's the issue. When wearing the spectacles over the Niqab (or in my case, the Niqab over the spectacles - I'll come to that), when I breathe heavily, it starts misting all over my glasses. So I try to wipe my glasses from the front and then slither my fingers under my spectacles, careful not to pull or push my Niqab, and by the time my fingers actually make it this far, voila! the mist would already have disappeared. 

 

So all in all, the misting isn't that big a deal at all. It lasts for what- 5 seconds? See how small a deal this is?

 

Niqab over the specs or vice versa?

 

I wear my spectacles first and then tie my Niqab over that. It's far easier than what my mother does. She gets all ready, waiting for the vehicle to come and when it finally does and all of us have gone past the door, she frantically starts searching for her Niqab (much to the annoyance of my father) and then haphazardly pushes her spectacles through the tiny slit of her Niqab. The final effect? A lop sided Niqab and an equally lop sided pair of glasses. My mother never learns.

 

So take my advice here. Always, always wear your Niqab over your spectacles. And make sure your Niqab has a wide slit so it wouldn't be too tight. Then, position your Niqab correctly and tie it. That's it. The Niqab tutorial!!!

 

The Niqab-Spectacle Shower

 

What if you happen to be a bespectacled Niqabi out in the rain and the rain starts hitting your glasses, making everything blurry? Well obviously there is no windshield for spectacles (hang on a second, I'll Google that)

 

OH MY GOD, THEY ACTUALLY HAVE THAT! Check this out guys, it's called the Wiper Glasses http://www.hawkin.com/wiper-glasses

So if you wouldn't mind looking silly with these, then buy it. Otherwise, you could, of course, simply take off your spectacles in the rain. You can't see clearly with all the rain anyway so might as well just be un-spectacled for a little... 

 

This small issue is faced by non-Niqabis as well so it all comes down to this - it's really no big issue at all.

 

I've been wearing spectacles since I was twelve and I started wearing my Niqab one year after that. So being a bespectacled Niqabi for a good 10-odd years, I think that's all the woes I can really think of. Any bespectacled Niqabis out there, can you think of any more?

 

So what am I getting at with this post? Wearing spectacles with the Niqab isn't any more difficult that wearing spectacles without the Niqab. It's actually really easy and honestly, I'm kind of glad to be wearing it with my Niqab because, ummmm, it's swag yo.... :D

 

*       *        *

 

I hope you enjoyed this post In sha Allah. Just thought of writing something a bit different on the blog for a change. If you want to have a good laugh, go read this LOL-worthy post by my sister. It has some awesome GIFs as well so do check it out- 5 Things You Need To Know About Niqabis

 

And if there are any bespectacled Niqabis who find it annoying to wear specs with the Niqab, just want to tell you that if it's difficult, Allah knows what you're going through. If He forgives our sins for a small thorn prick, do you think He is not going to reward you for your difficulty, even if it's a small one. So this small deal can actually be a big deal for us on the Day of Judgement In sha Allah when we see the rewards for it :) See, this post might be worth it after all!

 

If you have any ideas or suggestions for what I should post about next, leave a comment below or email me on niqablovers@gmail.com

 

 

 

INTERVIEW: A BEAUTIFUL NIQAB JOURNEY

Assalamu Alaikum Warhmatullahi Wabarakatuhu,

Just coming out of a long blog break and Jazakallah khair for the messages sisters! It's really your Duaas and support that keeps this blog going. Yes well, somewhat going but I'm working on it! ;)

Anyway, this is an interview I had some time back with Sister Adrie Hurmathullah. This should have been posted a while back but as you know, I've been a terrible procrastinator. Jazakallah khair for the lovely interview sister and Jazakallah khair for your patience! 

Do read through this amazing interview. There's a lot of inspiration and advice you can get from it, In Shaa Allah.


Tell us a little bit about yourself

My name is Adrie Hurmathullah and for the past few years I have been trying to figure out who I am as in: where do I see myself in the next few years, how I can improve my religion and help people to better understand it, and lots more! You can kind of say I'm overwhelmed with over thinking most of the time.

How long has it been since you've been wearing the Hijab?

Although I have been Muslim from a very young age, I hadn't began wearing hijab until I was sixteen and then recently decided that I wanted to wear niqab. I hadn't known that I would be so comfortable with doing so since I don't like the attention (I'm very shy and quiet) but its an amazing journey that I don't regret.

You now wear the Niqab. What made you take the extra step?

When first wearing niqab I would say I got my inspiration from watching my first YouTube video. Although my Nanni wore it occasionally, I was a little embarrassed to ask her and my mum. However, there was a girl around my age at the time who spoke of the importance of niqab and it being fardh.

Was it a difficult transition, going from a Hijabi to a Niqabi?

In the beginning it was a little difficult since I lost even more friends because they believed I had radical terrorist groups. But I took baby steps each day from occasionally wearing niqab to wearing it entirely EVERYDAY.

A lot of people tend to believe that wearing the Niqab is a barrier for education, work and social life. What are your thoughts on this?

To be honest, wearing niqab hasn't prohibited me from receiving a higher education. I am currently in Uni and the city I live in has a large population of Muslims and beautiful mosque. But it also depends on the environment and the individual. One problem that I have had lately is finding a job. Most people refuse or oppose hiring Muslim women due to the scarf and wearing niqab makes it a little more complicating. But in shaa Allah, I will be starting my own business soon which will eliminate the current troubles.

You live in a Muslim minority country. Is wearing the Niqab difficult there?

Unfortunately, a lot of Muslims in the US are being blamed for the actions of others. Some Muslims are also discouraged from following Islam as a whole. But I personally don't allow it to get beneath my skin. I keep mind that Allah is the all-knowing creator and whatever situations we experience is for a reason. It's important to remember this world, the Dunya, is only temporary and as a Muslim I am striving for something far more rewarding.

Is there any Niqab incident that you would like to share?

About a month ago I went into a store to purchase lunch. But I was told to leave or remove my veil. If I hadn't, the police would be notified immediately and I would be put in jail. But that is illegal here since a store is at fault for denying a person service because of their faith or opinion.

What is your best Niqab/Hijab moment?

My best niqab moment is everyday when my husband looks at me and tells me that I am even more beautiful with niqab and that he admires my dedication to Islam.

How do you feel you have changed after you started wearing the Niqab?

I am less self conscious about my appearance face wise. I don't have to cover myself with make-up and wonder what others will think. I am more confident and focused. 

If there are sisters that want to wear the Niqab but are afraid of doing so, what would your advice to them be?

Niqab isn't something that happens overnight to get use to. It takes time to adjust but if it's something you want to do then do it. Other people's thoughts and concerns shouldn't be yours because it is your life. People will continue to judge and mock you until the day you die. Niqab is a good thing. 

How do you think that Niqabis should deal with any hate?

Hatred is caused by ignorance and misconception. You cannot make someone see what has always been in front of their faces. Even when the resources are provided they'll continue to refuse. The only way to cure hatred is with kindness, love and forgiveness.

Niqab and freedom. This is something non-Muslims have misunderstood terribly. How do you feel that wearing the Niqab makes you feel free?

Wearing the niqab is an act of freedom. Each person has always been entitled to their own views and to dress as they pleased. Niqab is just the same for me, and in shaa Allah my sisters will be given the same freedom to make choices that are suitable for them.

Note: If you would like to be interviewed for our blog, leave us an email on niqablovers@gmail.com and we'll get back to you, In Sha Allah. Sisters only.