Thursday, January 12, 2017

"NO WAY WILL I MARRY A NIQABI!"




Niqabis live a life of pressure, let me tell you that, particularly if you happen to live in a non-Muslim country. On one side, you've got people calling you a 'Terrorist! Take Cover!" and the classic "Go back to your own country" (Well thank you, I'm already in my own country). And on the other side it's the pressure from the family "Oh come on, you're too young to wear the Niqab. Enjoy your life more" and of course, the pressure of the world in general... 
 
Niqabis - relatable much?

So anyway, I'm going a bit personal today. And I'll get right into it. Why is it so difficult for a Niqabi to be married? Or I had better rephrase it- Why do Muslim men not want to marry Niqabis? 

I've had the answer to this question in the most bizzare ways. Let me highlight it here.

It's taboo

Actually, a matchmaker told this to my mother. And my mother was just lost for words. I mean, back in the day when the Sahaba women covered their faces, would anyone have told it straight at their faces that it's taboo? Seriously, when did obeying Allah and doing something for Him become taboo? 

It's too extreme
 
So yes, in today's world where the more skin you show, the more free you are, I guess they've got a point in saying Niqabis are extreme. I mean, look at it this way: They choose to be extremely modest so yeah, if you don't want to marry a Niqabi, then it's a valid point you've given. Too extreme indeed.

She's disgusting when she eats out

This again is what a matchmaker told my mother. So apparently, this particular groom was utterly disgusted with the phenomenon of a Niqabi lifting her Niqab to eat her food at the restaurant. Say we Niqabis actually eat disgusting, then how would you know your future wife is going to be a decent eater. I mean, not all people eat decently, right? So what's the big deal? 

 



And umm, since when did our eating become you problem?

She won't talk to guests when they come over after marriage

So apparently, this is how they think we Niqabis are going to react when guests come over

 

... When in fact, we're going to be pretty much like this
 

I mean seriously, do you think that just by wearing the Niqab, we transform into cold-blooded human being that can't tolerate to stay with others? Like, seriously? 

 
So the matchmakers have now started telling my mother that she should ask my sister to remove her Niqab if she has to get married. SubhanAllah, see what the Muslim Ummah is coming to! Of course, it was a flat no because even if it means not getting married, why should we compromise on our values of wearing the Niqab just because someone else doesn't like it? 
 
But you know what- this is a test. Niqabis in my country especially have a real hard time getting married because most men nowadays apparently don't like their wives being covered. Less Hijab she has, the greater her chances of marriage are.

 
But Allah is the one who has already chosen who is to get married to whom. And because we are wearing the Niqab in obedience to Allah, do you think Allah is just going to abandon you like that? He will test you and see if you will take off the Niqab (which unfortunately I've seen many Niqabis do) and if you persist in doing what you are doing, then In sha Allah, when the time is right, Allah will give the best partner. Don't despair dear Niqabis :)

And as a final note, here goes:

 

15 comments:

  1. As salaamu Alaikum. That is very unfortunate, I actually thought men were naturally jealous snd would love for there widea to be completely covered but with all the sinning in our society, men have lost apart of there fitra

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  2. Habibty i love this niqabi post.. It's the same thing over here too.. May Allah grant us the most pious of men and make us pious too ameen.

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  4. SubhanaAllaah this is an awesome post for all the niqabis oot there who are confused in regards with removing Thierry niqab for the sake of marriage.May Allaah give you the reward for clearing the doubts.Believe me from past few days I have been getting thoughts of removing the niqab.Since very few people around me wear it ,most of the time my family forces me to remove it even in mixed gatherings ,but your post has made me even stronger and determined and In Sha Allaah I will remain steadfast.JazakallahuKhairan

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  5. In SA we have it easy. Many ladies wear it and many men want there ladies covered up.

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  6. Same thing here..everyone ask me to take off the niqab because men are not interested in niqabi..bit least they do know we are enjoying our life insidethe niqab:)

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  7. Allah didn’t make any thing hard to us unfortunately we made everything harder

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  8. Alhamdullilah.
    What an effective way to avoid marrying a weakling.
    We must spread the word. Insha Allah.

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  9. Very true!! This is what happening here. They are asking me to take off the niqab..they say itz bcz of your niqab that men are not interested in you.. may Allah SWT grant us a pious spouse. Aameen

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  10. I started thinking that if I don't remove my niqab no one will marry me but now I think I was wrong

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  11. I started thinking that if I don't remove my niqab no one will marry me but now I think I was wrong

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  12. An amazing post and totally relatable and everytime i come across some situations my love for Niqab just go to another level Alhamdulillaah 😅

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  13. My parents wanted me to marry a brother and he found it extreme. I am attractive and receive a lot of proposals but they back away when they learn I wear niqab. Also, some guys like the idea of women seeking knowledge, but the moment you ask them to clarify their aqeedah, who they seek knowledge from, they find it extreme. Subhanallah. I ask Allah to grant us all righteous men who are true to their covanent to Allah. Ameen

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